chuuuuuch!

church had always been a pretty big part of my life. things changed a bit when i first got to howard and i stopped going as often out of inconvenience. when i would return home and go back to church, things just weren't the same. i felt myself rolling my eyes, internally disagreeing, and counting down the minutes until it was over. i felt bad but, i decided that i needed to analyze these feelings. what i came up with was that i truly DO NOT agree with a lot of the things my church stands for. they really believe in trying to change people's ideas. whether it be evolution versus creation, or any other beliefs, i just don't believe in wasting my life away trying to CONVERT CONVERT CONVERT. i'll share my beliefs with you and if you don't like it, thats cool. also, i never really liked the head pastor. there is this air about him that rubbed me the wrong way. he is from the south and i always wondered how he felt about blacks. in my naivete i always thought that christians were not racist because we are supposed to love each other as brothers and sisters in christ. another aspect of my life that has changed (within the same spectrum) is my conservative beliefs. i realized that whether the bible says its wrong or not, i don't care about subjects like, gay marriage, gay rights, abortion.. basically all the taboo bullshit that christians obsess over. i don't feel a certain way about it, i just do not care. i'm INDIFFERENT on those subjects. i don't know if god made gays that way or made me be attracted to girls and boys, but i'm pretty sure He loves me regardless so who cares? yet another thing, is the fact that my mother told me something the head pastor said (about politics... obama and mccain) he said, "the answers to the problems in the world are not going to come from mccain, and they are CERTAINLY not going to come from obama." that REALLY REALLY bothered me. as previously mentioned, i am hugely supportive of obama, and that statement was so uncool. and now for the MEMBERS of the church. i don't like them. i haven't since about 8th grade. i always went to youth group when i was younger. honestly, it was the best part of my week. i loved it. then i got older. my friends (were older) and stopped coming or went to college. i stopped going and then realized that i hated the people there. i basically stopped being involved with anything in church, aside from singing. more recently, because of the recent election of my boo barack, i noticed some of the status' of people in my church and i was horrified. "he's going to get shot anyway" things like that. i've had it! i told my parents not to ask me to come to church because i'm never going in there again. they said i can do whatever i want. : ) so thats my conclusion!
peace