BROADWAYYYY!

i titled this blog 'Broadway' because i really like musicals. lol. i love that show Legally Blonde: The Search for Elle Woods. i've never seen the movie or the play, but i really like that show man! besides that, i'm absolutely 100% head over heels in LOVE with RENT the musical. i know every word to every song. when the movie comes on, i act out the entire thing. i'm in love with it. i also reeeeeally like Hairspray, but i've yet to see the play... which i'm sure is even better than the movie. usually it works that way.

besides all that jazz, i am really truly bored. i almost want to go back to work. if i was hanging out with my friends every day, it wouldn't be as bad, but i'm just sitting on the computer and watching tv all day. not fun man. i'm hoping that my good friend from college, shannel, is going to visit me on thursday. i'm REALLLLLY looking forward to it because i hate just hanging out with my mom and brother all the time. maybe i'll drive out to queens and visit my aunt. i'm seriously searching for things to do. i am at my wits' end! i don't blame my friends for having lives, i used to have a little bit of one.

boys. something i barely even talk about anymore right? well i mentioned a few blogs back that one of my exes was talking to me. well we actually talked on the phone last night for like two hours. i feel weird about it because i don't really see myself ever being with him. (he's the one with friends that are in gangs). do friends make a person? should i pass up a relationship with someone because of the company they hold? i DON'T KNOW! my answer to that question was yes with him, in the past, but i don't know. he really is a nice person, he's funny, sarcastic (like me), and we do have pretty decent conversations...not to mention he's really cute. those are the positives, and really, the one negative is the friends he has. is that fair? he, of course, doesn't think so... i don't know what to do. should i keep talking to him...letting him think that he might have a chance when he might not, or should i just cut off communication? ahhh!! besides all THAT, am i even ready to be in a relationship yet? i've been so focused on lauren lauren lauren, am i even ready to focus on someone else? i don't think so. well not yet at least.

i think my plan is going to be, i'll still talk to him and start a friendship with him and really get to know him... i refuse to rush into a relationship with someone ever again, it clearly doesn't work. please, if u read this, comment!! i need some advice!