"out of my league"

soo, since my last breakup, i've sworn off men completely (for now). i figure, i should just focus on myself and my grades and finishing up freshman year. so far so good. anywhoo...last night i was having a long talk with my roommate kara, and we were talking about the various good looking males on campus...most females agree that casey crawford is "the best looking guy on campus"...i mean, he is absolutely gorgeous. he has beautiful well kept dreads, hes tall, light skinned, perfect facial features, and tattoos. after all, he is a model. everything about this man is perfection! (except that pesky little girlfriend of his)...so i said to kara "casey is totally out of my league." kara said that i shouldn't say that...but why not? he IS out of my league. if i went up to him and said "listen casey, i think you're gorgeous and we should go out some time" he would more than likely look at me like i'm crazy, and then proceed to walk away. so that is that!

keeping with the same trend, i thought about my approach with men and i realized that when it comes to guys i like, i often use the phrase "out of my league"...so do these leagues actually exist, or are they just in my head? but when i really think about it, all "leagues" are is just a big fear of rejection. and i definitely have that...badly.

sooooo maybe casey crawford isn't out of my league...but im still not saying shit to him because he'll turn me down!

okay so i gotta work on my fear of rejection...